|I look very Canadian, eh?|
WHY the FUCK are you going to Canada, Six?
I know, I know...
I have been asking myself that very same question for the last couple of months.
The simple answer is, for Thanksgiving.
Wait? Canadian Thanksgiving?
No. That was LAST month. I’m going to Canada for American Thanksgiving...
I know. I'm confused too.
Okay, the not-so-simple answer is, because if I didn’t agree to go? The Girlfriend would beat me senseless... which, I MAY like... but that’s neither here nor there.
You see, The Girlfriend’s family owns a house in Waterloo, Quebec, and she has been trying to get me to go up there ever since
Here’s the thing about getting The Six-Fingered Monkey to go ANYWHERE, let alone anywhere outside of the country...
It doesn’t happen.
I don’t like to travel, at least not anywhere that requires taking an airplane or an extended car ride. I like being in my comfort zone and if my comfort zone needs to be extended outside of my town or state, it most certainly doesn’t extend outside of the borders of this great country where I live.
Hell, it took me 38 years to finally move out of my hometown to a neighboring town just 20 miles away.
I wasn’t getting out of this one, although I wanted to, especially with the added factor that the family home in Waterloo has no cable or Internet access.
Yet, as our big trip approaches, I am really looking forward to it.
With everything that has been going on lately, I think that the trip is exactly what I need and I know that it is going to be a wonderful and exciting experience for the boys.
So, I’m going to make the best of it.
I even put together a little bucket list of things to do while in Canada.
- See a Moose.
- Go to the only tavern in Waterloo (according to The Girlfriend, there is one) and play as much Celine Dion, Bryan Adams and Alanis Morrisette as possible on the jukebox, while attempting to order beers in French.
- See how many times I can pronounce the word, “about,” in my best Canadian English, before pissing someone off.
- Try and get at least ONE of my Canadian fans to show up in Waterloo, track me down, and ask me for an autograph.
- Relax and enjoy the experience.
I mean, I have a LOT of Canadian fans, according to Sitemeter.
It is possible.
Happy Turkey Day y’all, and watch out Canada... here I come!