There's a large bucket outside of my office building, which is essentially a big ashtray.
Its not the smartest solution because there is no sand in it. So, if you DON'T put your cigarette butt out BEFORE you put it in the bucket, it can cause a fire. I know this because I smoke a lot and I work there, but members of the general public don't and sometimes a fire ensues, especially when someone has thrown trash into the bucket.
As a smoker, I can tell the difference between an ashtray and a trash can, but apparently some people cannot. I've seen food wrappers, tissues, napkins, McDonald's bags, you name it, shoved inside the bucket. Thankfully, whoever is in charge of emptying the bucket realizes this trend and empties it quite regularly.
Today, when I arrived at work, I noticed the most peculiar butt bucket item I've ever seen in nearly a decade working in that building... Four yellow car fresheners. You know, the ones that are shaped like trees?
I guess its better than littering, but I took extra special care when I put out my cigarette on my way into work today because God only knows what burning scented trees could do to one's lungs. That's kind of an ironic statement, I suppose.
Anyway, like I said, that was probably the strangest item ever to grace the butt bucket... until around 2 p.m.
That was when I noticed this:
Yup. That's a pair of women's panties.
Now, it may have been LESS disturbing if they had appeared overnight, but in the middle of the day? Outside of a busy office building?
Look, I understand the need to throw away undergarments in a jiffy... Like the time I shit myself at a Denny's somewhere between Philadelphia and New York back in the 1990s. But I, at least, had the decency to remove my underwear in the bathroom, inside of a stall, and put them in a garbage can that had a lid.
I mean, come on... there is a right way and a wrong way to do things... no?
The thing is, I can't decide whether or not there is a connection between the yellow trees and panties... but I really want there to be!
Once you've finished trying to wrap your head around this, why don't you take a moment to check out some of the shit I've been working on while I wasn't here:
I just finished my new personal website, meant to market my professional (I use that term loosely) side.
I have been pinning a lot of super-awesome stuff over on Pinterest, you should follow me there because I am awesome.
You should also like me on Facebook, because I said so... bitches!

9 comments:
We all know you wear panties and you are upset that such a nice pair was discarded recklessly.
We all know you wear panties and you are upset that such a nice pair was discarded recklessly.
@Wow & @NicePeace: Okay, now I am REALLY confused and NOT because I was tempted to take the panties for my own. Are you guys the same person? Is it Groundhog Day? Am I high? Are you high? This is all more disturbing than finding panties in the butt bucket.
Maybe they belonged to the woman i saw wearing a see through dress. Those kinda resemble the panties she had on!
And I thought gum in the smoke bucket was disgusting. If the undies in the smoke bucket are disgusting, I can only imagine the girl who put them there. EW. Unless it was a man hiding evidence of an affair. Oh! I just came up with a blog idea!! I will post it, link this post and see what happens!!
I will check out your "professional" side too! AND.......I HAVE LIKED YOU ON FACEBOOK! GO TO MY SITE AND LIKE ME BACK, BITCH! =)
Lastly, I am no longer at my Diaries of a Neurotic Non-Trad blog (I saw my link on your sidebar...thank you so much)! I am now at my new home called "My Life on the N-List" and http://thenlistblog.com
K....going to post now. Thanks for the inspiration!!
You are sooo not ready for this!
http://thenlistblog.com/2012/06/05/paying-homage-to-thongs-and-link-ups/
One of the many wonderful traits MoMo and I have is how great minds think alike. You really are lucky to know us. As much as one can know someone without having actually met them.
@Wow: You and Mo fucking SCARE me.
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