Spring has sprung... and so have I!

I'm a sucker for cute feet!

Tomorrow officially marks the first day of spring but, as far as I’m concerned, the beauty of the season has already arrived. Around these parts, we topped out at a sunny 70 degrees today... Not a bad way to say “buh-bye” to winter, though you can hardly consider the last three months to be much of a winter here. We were lucky to have above-average temperatures and barely any snow.

Don’t get me wrong, I love marked season changes, which is one of the reasons why I love living on Long Island. However, I’m not gonna cry over the fact that we had such a mild winter.

Enough about winter, though... it’s SPRING, bitches!  

Spring is my favorite time of year for a whole host of reasons, most of which can be attributed to the winter doldrums. There is nothing more refreshing, even after the mildest of winters, than spending time outside in the fresh air or inside with the windows open and a cool breeze winding through the house. There is also the added entertainment value associated with watching the cat lose his shit as spring fever sets in!

Not to sound cheesy (though I often do), spring is truly the season of rebirth... the flowers are blooming... the air is crisp... and everything is, well, a little bit brighter and a lot more fun. Today, for example, was the first day I was able to roll down my car windows (well, only one window because the other three don’t work and I’m too cheap to fix them), rudely blare music that people won’t appreciate and sing at the top of my lungs while driving down the street -- one of my favorite pastimes.

Perhaps the most exciting aspect of spring, however, is the sudden emergence of skin.

Huh?  

Skin. Nothing thrills me more than seeing women people hang up their winter coats in exchange for tank tops, shorts and sandals.

Mm... skin.

Oh jeez, here we go again!

What? As a connoisseur of hot babes gorgeous chicks beautiful women, spring ushers in that half of the year when guys like me (who appreciate the curves and the soft skin of a woman) can barely concentrate on anything else as we float through our days and nights “high” on the rush of checking girls out.

If you’re a dude, you know EXACTLY what I am talking about!

Ah... poetry in motion.

Of course, there’s not a lot of skin out there just yet, its not warm enough... but the winter coats are gone and the tease of the female form is everywhere... For me, its kinda like foreplay for the summer, when less will be left to the imagination.

OMG Six! You are such a fucking perv, dude! The girlfriend must be a saint!

The Girlfriend: I’m gonna stop following you on Pinterest.

Me: What the fuck? Why?

The Girlfriend: I’m tired of seeing all of the pins on your “hot babes” board!

Me: Seriously?

The Girlfriend: Whatever.

Me: Oh. My God. First of all, the board is called “Hot Stuff,” which means that it isn’t limited to just pictures of chicks. I mean, that’s all I have posted so far, but that’s not necessarily all I’m going to post.

The Girlfriend: Whatever.

Me: This from the girl who claims to “appreciate” porn!

The Girlfriend: Maybe I should start pinning pictures of hot guys.

Me: I’m down. Hell, maybe I’ll re-pin some of them myself. What are you gonna do then, huh? When your boyfriend starts pinning hot girls AND hot guys? Betcha didn’t think about that one...

The Girlfriend: Whatever.

The next day... out of nowhere... via text.

The Girlfriend: Pinterest pix bother me cuz they are not skanky prono gals. They are actually cute. Does that make me crazy?

Me: Yes.

The Girlfriend: Stop.

Me: If I could post skanky porn whores to Pinterest? I’d be all over it. Plus, I imagine doing dirty porn star things to the girls on my Pinterest board, so I think that kinda counts.

The Girlfriend: That doesn’t make sense.

Me: It does to me.

The Girlfriend: You don’t get what I’m saying.

Me: I totally get it. I’m just ignoring what you’re saying... AND trying to be a dick.

The Girlfriend: That’s not cool.

Me: Look, its totally not about the girls, but about what they are wearing!

The Girlfriend: Oh

The Girlfriend: Ok

The Girlfriend: I can deal with that.

The Girlfriend: I like playing dress up. ;)

Ah yes... a partner in crime AND a saint, indeed.